


the earth begins to sway

by addendum



Category: Bob's Burgers (Cartoon)
Genre: F/M, Oral Sex, Porn with Feelings, Post-Coital Cuddling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-31
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:15:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28444515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/addendum/pseuds/addendum
Summary: Linda invites Bob up to her apartment for the first time.
Relationships: Bob Belcher/Linda Belcher
Comments: 2
Kudos: 12





	the earth begins to sway

Bob wasn’t sure what to do with his hands. He’d been on third dates before, but he’d never been on one with someone who he liked quite as much as he liked the woman sitting across from him now. They were sitting on Linda’s couch after a night spent eating spaghetti and swapping stories, and Bob wasn’t sure what to do next. 

Things had been fine for almost twenty minutes after they arrived in her little apartment, as they’d just continued the conversation they’d been having on the ride over. Now, though, there was a lull. 

Bob knew what this lull meant. He’d felt it before, on dates with other people. It was the quiet interval that often befell two people who weren’t sure how to make the next move. Bob certainly had no idea how to seduce Linda, who was much more bubbly and overt than he had ever been. Their previous date had ended with some kissing and heavy petting, and Bob was still shocked that he’d managed to get that far. 

He wanted to take things further with Linda, but he also didn’t want to be too presumptuous. She had been the one to invite him up to her apartment, but he still feared he could be reading the situation incorrectly. He didn’t want to make her feel uncomfortable or make himself look like an idiot. 

“So, what do you want to—?” 

“You wanna make out?” She asked before he could get his words out. She had a goofy, excited grin on her face. 

Bob nodded vigorously, his chest filling with relief when he realized that they were on the same page. 

“Yes, please.” He said, silently cursing himself when his response came out sounding much lamer than it had in his head. 

Shaking away his self consciousness, he brought their lips together and followed her lead when she laid back on the couch. He pulled away, hovering above her for a moment as he wondered if he had permission to advance past kissing.

“You’re sweet, Bob.” Linda said, reading his mind. “You can touch me.” 

Bob couldn’t hold back his smile. He had been looking forward to this part all night. He grabbed one of her breasts as he continued to kiss her, using his other hand to cradle her face. 

He had gotten to about the same place on their previous date, fondling her over her clothes before her roommate had come home unexpectedly and ruined the moment. 

“My roommate’s staying at her girlfriend’s place tonight.” Linda said, evidently having read his mind for the second time. “We have the place to ourselves.” 

She looked up at him with her lips slightly parted, her chest heaving. Bob knew she was hinting that she wanted more.

“Right.” He said awkwardly. 

“That’s...yeah, okay. That’s great news. I think. I mean, unless you don’t want it to be great news. Because we don’t have to do anything else. Obviously. Kissing is great.” 

Linda raised an eyebrow at him, amused. 

“Do you think I wore this dress because it’s comfortable, mister?” She asked. 

Bob’s eyes traveled up and down her body, looking at the dress that had been driving him crazy all night. It was tantalizing. Not too revealing, but tight in all the right places. It didn’t look very comfortable to him, but he had never worn anything like it before. 

“Uh...” He said, flustered by her question. He had no idea what answer she was looking for. The confused look on his face made Linda laugh again. 

“No!” She said, answering her own question. “I hate this friggin thing. I’ve had a wedgie all night. I only wore this, because I thought it would make you want me. So...do ya?” 

Bob gulped, blushing slightly at the idea that she’d already been thinking about what she wanted to do with him. The idea that she had been imagining this moment as much as he had was thrilling. 

“Uh...yeah.” He said honestly. “I really want you. You’re...incredibly sexy.” 

He resisted the urge to cringe at how awkward the words sounded coming from his mouth. It helped that Linda seemed to like his line, because she sat up to kiss him again. 

“And I want you!” She announced when she pulled away. “So stop acting so intimidated. And just for the record, I think you’re the incredibly sexy one.” 

Bob actually chuckled at that, finding the suggestion that he was the more attractive of the two of them to be completely absurd. 

He kissed her deeply, pressing her back down onto the couch. They kissed for a few minutes, their hands eagerly exploring each other’s bodies, before Linda pulled away again.

“You wanna get this dress off of me now?” She asked. “It really is uncomfortable.” 

Bob nodded. He blindly searched for the zipper on her back, panicking slightly when he began to fumble with it. Luckily, he managed to pull it all the way down after only a few seconds. He helped her shuffle out of the dress, tossing it to the floor when it was all the way off. 

He stared down at her, taking in the new view of her in a black bra and matching underwear. For the first time, he saw a moment of nervousness flicker across her face. It occurred to Bob that his staring in silent awe may have appeared to her as displeasure with her appearance. 

“Well?” She asked, a vulnerable look in her eyes. 

Bob was quick to remedy her doubts, shaking his head to assure her that she was reading his response wrong.

“Great!” He said. “I mean...you look great. Really. You’re gorgeous.” 

She looked relieved, giving him a tiny, sheepish smile. He grinned back and resumed kissing her, reaching a hand up under her bra after a moment to cup her bare breast. Linda smiled into his kiss, a small sigh of pleasure escaping her lips.

“You can take it off.” She told him in between kisses. “Tell me if the clasp gives you a hard time.”

Bob reached behind her to undo her bra and was surprised to find that he only struggled with the hook for a moment. He threw it to the floor with her dress and pulled back to look at her. There was a mischievous glint in Linda’s eyes as she watched him check her out, and she didn’t look at all nervous anymore.

“Oh...wow.” He said dumbly, his mouth hung slightly open. He’d known she was beautiful, but her body was even more amazing than he’d imagined it to be. 

“Yeah?” She asked teasingly. “You gonna touch me or what?” 

Bob obliged, covering both breasts with his hands and squeezing. He took one of her nipples between two fingers and toyed with it, remembering that gesture as something the women he’d been with in the past had enjoyed. 

Linda’s smirk faltered, and she let out a quiet gasp. Hearing her arousal turned Bob on even more. 

“You’re...so out of my league it’s ridiculous.” He muttered, still playing with her nipple. 

To his surprise, Linda shot him a glare. He pulled his hand away instantly, afraid that he’d inadvertently hurt her. 

“Out of your league?” She scoffed. “Yeah, right, Mr. Tom-Selleck-wishes-his-mustache-looked-this-good. Don’t put yourself down, Bob!” 

Bob laughed at her compliment, knowing she was only flattering him. He knew from a conversation on their first date that there was no way he would ever live up to her infatuation with Tom Selleck’s mustache. 

“Sorry.” He said. “It’s just...you know. You have clean hair and a...perfect body. My hair always looks weird and greasy, and everything else about me has been going downhill since I turned twenty-five.” 

Bob almost felt as though he had to announce his shortcomings. The discrepancy in their appearances felt like an elephant in the room that needed to be addressed, like Linda must already be thinking about how much better she could do. 

“What?” She asked. “Are you out of your mind? We’re both a couple of hot tamales! Why do you think I’ve been trying to get in your pants all night, Bob?”

Bob felt his face heat up, and he let himself smile at the compliment instead of immediately refuting it. 

“You really think I’m...hot?” He asked. Linda smiled. 

“I already told you, remember?” She said. “You’re incredibly sexy.” 

They smiled at each other for a moment. Bob felt grateful that she was willing to listen to his insecurities and help him combat them. 

He still felt like Linda could do miles better than him, but knowing that someone so good looking was attracted to him was a definite confidence booster. It felt good to feel wanted. 

“Hey, wait a minute!” Linda said suddenly, still smiling. “I’m sitting here practically naked, and you still have everything but your shoes on!”

She tugged on his tie to bring him closer to her, sending a new rush of arousal to his groin. 

“You’re making me feel like a real floozy here, Bob.” She said. “Can I get you out of this shirt?” 

Bob simply nodded as she sat up, a determined look on her face. She got to work undoing his tie and the buttons on his dress shirt and then hurriedly pulling it off of him. 

“Ooh!” She said when it had been discarded. “I love a man with a hairy chest! So sexy.” 

She brought him in for a kiss, and the feeling of their bare chests pressed together made both of them more greedy for contact. Bob grabbed hungrily at Linda’s backside as she climbed into his lap. She grinded against him, eliciting a soft moan from both parties. 

“You feel so good.” Linda mumbled in between kisses. Bob placed his hands on either side of her waist, and she kissed him harder. 

With her eyes still closed, she set a hand on his thigh. Bob’s heart leapt at feeling her so close to touching his erection. He must’ve had a physical reaction to her touch, because Linda giggled against his mouth. The sound was endearing, and Bob’s own soft chuckle followed. He really liked her. 

“Can I get you out of these pants?” She asked, resting her forehead against his.

“Mmhm.” Bob mumbled, too enchanted with her to give a proper response. 

Linda wasted no time working on the button on his pants, quickly undoing it before yanking down his zipper. A thought struck Bob suddenly, and he placed a hand on top of hers to stop her from proceeding. She looked up at him, puzzled. 

“Shouldn’t we move this to the bedroom?” Bob asked. 

He had a feeling Linda’s roommate wouldn’t be too pleased to see how far they had gotten on their shared living room couch. Linda considered his question for a moment, looking at little miffed at having to pause. 

“I guess you’re right.” She said. “Do you have a...?” 

Bob nodded.

“Yeah. In my wallet. Back pocket.” 

Linda’s hand wandered until she found his wallet. She opened it and rifled around for a moment before pulling out a single condom. 

“Someone knew he was getting some tonight.” She teased with smug smile. 

“Wishful thinking.” Bob replied, only a little embarrassed. “Let’s go.” 

He shuffled the rest of the way out of his pants, leaving them in their pile of abandoned clothes. He hoped they would remember to collect their things before Linda’s roommate came home in the morning, or they would have an embarrassing trip out to the living room. 

Linda took his hand, and Bob was surprised to find that the gesture made his stomach fill with butterflies. He really liked how it felt holding her hand, and he wondered what it would feel like to do so in a more public setting. Linda led him down a small hallway and into her room. She shut the door behind her, plunging them into darkness. 

“Lights on or off?” She asked. Bob didn’t have to stop to think about it. 

“On.” He answered immediately. “I want to look at you.” 

Linda grinned and flicked on a lamp. Bob glanced briefly around the room, taking in a poster of Madonna and a framed photo of her and a woman who he thought must be the sister she had already told him stories about. 

He felt a strange sense of pride, honored that Linda was allowing him to come inside her most personal living space like this. She placed both hands on his chest and kissed him again, and thoughts of anything other than her body vanished from his mind. 

“Let’s pick up where we left off, huh?” She suggested. 

Bob responded with a quiet moan of agreement, and one of her hands traveled down to squeeze the semi in his boxers. The distraction of moving rooms had caused his erection to retreat slightly, but it only took a moment of her skillful hand movements to restore it. She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling them both down on the bed with him on top of her. 

Bob continue to kiss her, squeezing her breasts as she grabbed onto his cock once more. He loved the way her face shifted when he touched her, clearly piquing her arousal. 

“Let me take care of you.” He whispered. She stared up at him, nodding, with trust in her eyes. 

“Please.” She said. “I want you to touch me.” 

Bob gently removed her glasses, placing them on her nightstand. He placed a tender kiss on her forehead before moving downward, kissing her breasts. The hand Linda had on him fell to the wayside as he continued downward, leaving kisses up and down her stomach. She gasped softly when he tugged at the waistband of her underwear. 

“Is this okay?” He asked, and she nodded fervently. 

Bob slowly removed her underwear, pulling it to her knees.

“Take ‘em all the way off.” She instructed him, her hips bucking forward slightly in excitement. 

He did as he was told, pulling them over her smooth calves and off of her body completely before casting them to the side. Linda parted her legs for him, granting him entry as he sunk down to bring his mouth toward her core. He kissed her inner thighs, causing her to whine. He ran his tongue slowly along the same spot, and she groaned in frustration. 

“You ready?” He teased. 

“I’ve been ready since you picked me up at seven!” She snapped, making him laugh lightly. “Just do it already, Bob!” 

Bob obliged, bringing his mouth to her wet entrance. He vaguely registered that she was gripping her bedsheets in one hand as he licked her. 

She whimpered, obviously attempting to stifle her moans for the sake of her surrounding neighbors. Bob spared a glance up at her, and a surge of titillation coursed through his body when he saw the pleasure on her face. 

He continued to dip his tongue inside of her, delighting in the noises she made. He wasted no time finding her clit, prodding at it for a moment before he took it in his mouth. Linda had to cover her own mouth with her hand to suppress her moan. 

Bob continued to smother the spot with attention, loving the way Linda’s legs naturally spread further to open herself up to him. The way she writhed around was sexy, and he loved seeing how excited he was making her. She cried out in rapture as he carried on, but she soon put a hand on his head to push him away. 

Bob shot up instantly, concerned by her suddenly putting a stop to things. He placed a comforting hand on her thigh. 

“Is everything okay?” He asked.

“More than okay.” She told him, bringing a hand to his still bulging erection. “I was going to finish, but I want to do that with you inside of me.” 

Bob gaped at her, excitement shooting through him. Obviously he had known what direction their evening was likely heading in, but hearing her say what she wanted so brazenly was a turn on. 

“Okay.” He said. “That sounds incredible.” 

Linda beamed, pulling his boxers down. His erection sprang forward, and Linda stared at it for a second before looking at Bob in awe. 

“Geez, somebody call 911!” She quipped. “Cause Bob is in possession of a deadly weapon!” 

Bob laughed disbelievingly, feeling his face heat up at her comment. 

“Stop it.” He grinned. Linda threw her head back, also laughing.

“I mean, seriously!” She said. “This thing’s huge! Don’t get me wrong. I love it! I want it to do all sorts of crazy things to me. It’s just..wow. You never mentioned that you were hiding this guy.” 

Bob laughed again, kissing her smiling mouth as she pulled his boxers down. 

“You’re definitely crazy.” He said fondly. 

Linda’s face softened, and she smiled sweetly at him before crashing her mouth against his. Bob reciprocated, sucking on her top lip. He was painfully hard now, and he was that glad she seemed keen on offering him some relief.

“Are you ready?” He asked softly. 

Linda nodded, holding his face in her hands and drawing nearer. Bob kissed her, putting a sturdy hand on her small waist. She reached for the condom that she’d set on the nightstand when they came in, and Bob hurriedly unwrapped it. He tossed the debris on her bedroom floor and put it on. 

“I want you so bad, Linda.” He said. His eyes moved up and down her body, taking her in. 

“Then take me.” She responded. Once again, her boldness was electrifying. She looked desperate and self-assured at the same time, and Bob found it incredibly sexy. 

He smirked, kissing her again as he carefully lowered into her. Linda inhaled sharply as he entered her, her hands gripping onto his bare shoulders. The initial penetration felt heavenly, especially after everything they’d done to build up to that moment. Bob thrusted into her, and she sighed, burying her face in his shoulder. 

Bob groaned at the tightness that now surrounded him. His body filled with warmth, a tingling sensation running through his cock. He could feel how wet she was, and he sunk further inside of her. He felt her warm breath on his ear as he began to move up and down. 

He twisted his hips in a circular motion and felt Linda’s fingernails dig into his back. Her grip tightened as he began to move with more force. The sound of her whining in his ear encouraged Bob, and he continued at the same degree of pressure. 

“So good.” Linda said breathily, overcome with enjoyment. 

“I know.” Bob mumbled in return, kissing the only spot on her neck he could reach without risking compromising their position. 

He felt at ease as he pleasured her for a few minutes more, and he was surprised by his lack of discomfort or anxiety. Typically, his first times with sexual partners had been rife with insecurity. Sometimes, he felt so awkward that he found it hard to fully immerse himself in the moment. 

He didn’t feel that with Linda. They had a natural chemistry that he didn’t expect. He felt a level of comfort with her that he could tell was mutual, as though they had been together for years. If they did encounter an awkward moment, Bob felt confident that he could simply laugh it off with her. 

“You look beautiful like this.” He whispered to her, feeling like they were the only two people in the world. 

Linda opened her mouth to say something, but her words quickly dissolved into a sharp cry when Bob moved upward. Her eyelids fluttered, and he could tell he’d landed on her clitoris again. 

“Yeah?” He asked breathlessly, continuing to stimulate the same spot. 

Linda nodded, too overwhelmed to give him a coherent response. Bob could feel his orgasm approaching, but he did his best to delay it. He wanted her to get there, and he didn’t want to take away from her moment. He hoped that their foreplay had brought her close enough to the edge that her body was now more anxious for its release.

He bent to put his mouth on her breast, running his tongue over her nipple while still pushing attentively against her clit. He felt her squirm, her legs wriggling with pleasure. He took her nipple in his mouth, sucking at it as she murmured something unintelligible. 

“Bob.” She moaned. 

The sound of his name in her voice made him feel empowered. She sounded ravished, and knowing that he was causing it was amazing. 

“I’m making you feel good.” He said, stating it as fact rather than phrasing it as question. 

Everything from her body language to her cracking voice was making it evident how good she felt. She ran her hands through his hair, and he felt how tightly she was latching onto him. 

“Are you close?” He asked knowingly, mumbling against her mouth. 

“Yeah—yes. Yeah.” She panted. 

Bob held her close to him, and she wrapped her legs around him. He felt her muscles contract, and she moaned. 

“Oh...shit.” She said, and he felt her relax against him. 

Bob felt relieved, knowing he had brought her to climax. He allowed himself to refocus on the stirring arousal in his own body, as she held onto his face with both hands and kissed him on the mouth. A roar of feeling shot through him, and he released inside of her with a grunt. 

“Oh my god.” He moaned. 

Linda continued to intertwine their mouths before peppering his face with kisses. He embraced her, deeply inhaling her scent. He pulled away after a moment, taking his condom off and tying it before tossing it in a waste basket she had by her bed. 

He collapsed on the bed, out of breath, and Linda crawled over to rest her head on his chest. Bob leaned slightly over to press a kiss to the top of her head. 

“Was that good for you?” He whispered. 

Linda turned her neck to smile at him. Her dark hair was a disaster, and her cheeks were both bright pink. She looked beautiful. 

“That was perfect for me.” She said, before snuggling against him. “You’re good at that.” 

“You’re amazing at that.” Bob replied seriously. 

He brought a hand up to stroke her hair, which was something he’d never felt compelled to do with any of the other men and women he’d slept with. Linda pulled him closer, entangling their legs. 

Bob felt a rush of affection towards her. He could feel a connection pulsing between them, and he didn’t think it was just the typical post-sex feeling. She was on top of him, and he had just been inside of her, and he still felt like she wasn’t close enough. 

He had an abrupt urge, a strong desire to solidify her place in his life. 

“Do you want to come over to my place tomorrow?” He asked, the words rushing out of his mouth before he could stop them. “I could make us dinner.” 

Linda answered with a kiss. 

“Really?” She asked. “I’d love that.”

She laughed. 

“Do you offer to make dinner for all the girls you sleep with?” 

Bob smiled sheepishly, knowing that she could probably tell how into her he was. He was thrilled that she seemed equally interested in spending more time together. 

“Uh...no.” He said. “I’ll make you whatever you want.” 

“Sounds perfect.” Linda said. “I can see those cooking skills of yours in action.” 

Bob had mentioned his love of cooking a few times in passing on the dates they’d been on. It flattered him to know she was paying attention to him when he shared things with her. 

Linda turned away from him, lying her head back down on his chest. She sighed contentedly. 

“I could fall asleep here.” She said. “You’re so cozy.” 

“So, sleep there.” Bob said, stroking her hair again. Linda froze briefly, and he was scared he’d said something wrong. 

“You really want to stay the night?” She asked. 

Bob was thrown off by the question. In his mind, him staying the night was a given. He definitely didn’t want to move from their comfortable position. 

“Oh.” He said, flustered. “I...I don’t have to. I just thought—“

“I want you to!” Linda said, cutting him off. “I told you, Bob. You’re so cozy. I’d love to fall asleep like this.”

Bob was glad she was facing away from him, so she couldn’t see the dopey grin he had on his face when he kissed the crown of her head. 

“Then I’ll stay.” He said. “Are you ready to sleep now?” 

Linda nodded, and he felt the movement brush against him. 

“Yeah.” She chuckled. “You really gave me a workout, Bob.” 

He laughed softly, running a soothing hand along the side of her body. He hoped it would help lull her to sleep. 

“Same here.” He said. “Goodnight, Linda.” 

Linda sat up and stared at him for a moment, a serene expression on her face. She kissed him once, delicately, before pulling away. 

“Goodnight, Bobby.” She whispered, and Bob felt a sense of calm wash over him.

**Author's Note:**

> I guess I write bob’s burgers porn now. This is so humiliatingggggggg


End file.
